I wrote this in 2005.  This was a time when i was just starting to get back into a relationship with the lord.  I have always known him.  But just like any other person who has walked on the face of the earh, as I got older, I prayed and talked to him less and less.  In 2005, life started to be real.  I got married, started a family, bought a house, etc. etc.  Then something happened that made me a nervous wreck.  I couldnt eat, sleep, interact with anyone.  I was a shell of myself.  I then started to wrtie my feelings on paper.  It was soothing but still the sleepless nights came.  It was then I asked my wife (girlfriend at the time to go to church with me).  At church, I never felt so alive.  How could i be so dumb and not allow myself these feelings for so long!!!

Sometime after thatr visit, I wrote this on my journal.  I don’t remember exactly what i was feeling at the moment, but reading it still has a comforting effect on my soul.  I do remember writing this after meditating on what God would be saying to me if we were face to face.

Please son, do not worry in life.

Always trust me, even though I am not in sight.

Problems & troubles continue to arise,

temptations & sin comes always as a surprise.

Remember that life is not always easy,

My son Jesus is the perfect example.

They laughed, hurt, & lied to him;

Yet, his love was endless and still.

He died on the cross for all of Man’s sins.

When the devil attacks you;

He will come at you from different angles.

Just remember to trust me;

And soon you’ll be in greener pastures.

I will never leave your side.

You are my son.

Surely a father always watches his son.

So tell me all your worries & worry no more.

7/13/2005

I know its not perfect.  But it did its job in showing me God’s love that day.  It shows me God’s love even now.  I pray that it will help out somebody out there as well.

In Jesus Name,

AMEN